Lights, Camera, Kiss Me (Original): Chapter 8
"I can't stop this..."
Thanks to C for proofreading, and Daisy for her feedback, and faerie15 for her library material discussion, lol.
________________________________________________
Mac closed her eyes just as Ryan’s lips touched hers. His kiss was soft and gentle at first, but utterly, utterly perfect. Had she expected anything less from Australia’s Romeo? Absolutely not. She felt her toes curl, and her heart lurch. Lust ripped through her centre like a rocket ship taking off; the heat it generated making her feel as if she were about to melt into the floor.
She removed her hands from the front of his shirt so she could wind her arms around his neck and bring him closer to her. And that was when everything changed. His kiss went from soft and teasing to hungry and possessive in the blink of an eye. Her lips parted underneath his, allowing his tongue to slide along the length of hers, stoking the fire already burning low in her belly.
His hands wrapped around her waist, pulling her snugly against him and she could feel the long, hard proof of his desire. Satisfaction swept through her as he moaned and deepened the kiss even further; his mouth and tongue doing the most sinfully wicked things to her. Her knees wobbled underneath her, which was hardly surprising since her entire body felt as if it was made of jelly.
He tore his mouth away from hers to take a breath. “I knew it would be like this,” he said to her, backing her up against her kitchen bench so she wouldn’t fall. Then his mouth was on hers again.
She didn’t need to ask him what he meant. It was as if he couldn’t get enough of her. And she understood that feeling all too well. She couldn’t get enough of him, either. She’d waited a long time for this moment. But this was about more than the poster she’d had on her wall at fifteen. This was about more than the crush she’d had on Ryan before she knew him.
The man in her arms was someone she respected and admired greatly. A friend. Someone she cared about deeply. Too deeply. She already knew she was dangerously close to falling in love with him. She’d tried so hard not to make the same mistake that she’d made with Danny, but it was hopeless. She couldn’t stop this. Her head snapped back with the force of her thoughts, exposing her neck. She shivered and clung tighter to him as his lips grazed the sensitive skin just under her ear before trailing them down her neck.
Ryan knew things were far too heated. He was already too worked up. His whole body felt as if it was on the verge of exploding. The need to merge his body with hers was so strong he didn’t know how to resist it. He’d held himself back from her for so long, denying what he wanted – what he needed; and now that she was finally in his arms, he had no control left to stop what they were doing.
He felt her tremble. He tasted the perfume on her neck. It was all one giant turn-on. Every resolve, every rule – every determined thought he’d had about resisting her was crumbling rapidly. He’d done everything he could to avoid giving in, but the truth was that he just couldn’t do it any longer. He couldn’t kiss her and touch her and not need more. If she didn’t want this then she had to be the one to stop them.
Her cheeks were rosy and her eyes were filled with lust and more than a hint of vulnerability as he pulled away to look at her.
“Mac, I want you too much. I can’t stop this.”
She should walk away from this, Mac thought. She knew she should. But how much longer could she fight this for if she did? One week? Maybe two if she were lucky? It had been an uphill battle from the start. The only reason she’d made it this far was because Ryan had been fighting the attraction too. Now it appeared he was done fighting it.
But if they slept together now, how would he treat her afterward? What could she expect after their heated moment was over?
“What is this, Ryan?” she asked him huskily. “What are we doing?”
Ryan swallowed. She had every right to ask; every right to know, but he didn’t know what to tell her. He had no idea what they were doing – what he was doing.
“I don’t know, Mac,” he told her. “I know that I should, but I don’t. I just know that I can’t seem to be around you anymore without wanting to be with you. I’ve tried staying away from you, but I miss you so damn much. We have these scenes coming up and…I don’t know what I’m doing or what this is.”
Mac felt her disappointment crash through her so fast it left her reeling. She didn’t know what she’d expected him to say, but it hadn’t been that. She knew up front that Australia’s Romeo never stuck around for more than three months. He didn’t fall in love. He wasn’t interested in forever. She realized all that. But to hear him say he had no clue what this was, or what he wanted it to be, left her speechless.
“I don’t know how to handle this thing between us,” he said to her.
Well that made two of them, didn’t it? Bitterness and sadness swirled around inside her. At least he wasn’t lying to her about it, though. She supposed that was something. Danny had let her believe she was special to him in some way – that there was promise to their future. Ryan wasn’t trying to pull a fast one on her. He wasn’t telling her what she wanted to hear so she’d go to bed with him. His honestly didn’t make her feel any better, but it did make it impossible for her to lie to herself about what was happening here.
“So this is a once-off?” she asked him. “A way to let off steam before our upcoming scene this week?”
Everything he said was coming out wrong, Ryan thought. She made it sound as if he wanted to use her, but he didn’t. That wasn’t what this was. Okay, he didn’t know what this was, but it definitely wasn’t that. She wasn’t a quick screw. Mac obviously needed him to put a name to what they were doing, and he could appreciate that. After what had happened between her and Westlaker, he supposed it was the sensible thing to do.
“I’m trying to stop you making the same mistakes with Brad that you made with Danny.”
“That’s very noble of you, but Brad’s not the one I’m likely to make the same mistake with.”
Guilt clawed at him. He knew that sleeping with her wouldn’t have a good outcome, but he just wasn’t strong enough to stop this anymore. He’d tried. Over and over again he’d tried. They both had. He’d reached his limit.
“This isn’t a once-off,” he said to her. “I don’t want it to be a once-off. If you want to call it something, then call it a casual relationship.”
Ryan wished he could tell Mac that this was more – that this thing between them was special, but he wouldn’t. He wanted her. He cared about very much, but whatever they started would be casual, just like every other relationship he’d had.
"I shouldn't feel the way that I feel about you."
He tried to push the gnawing doubts aside as he remembered Mac’s drunken confession. He was being honest with her right now. If she agreed to go along with this, then that was her decision. She wouldn’t agree to something if she didn’t think she could handle it, would she?
“So you want a fling?” she asked him. “A casual relationship?”
“Yes,” he said to her.
Ryan Moore’s Three-Month-Special, Mac thought. Well, it would be three months if he didn’t grow bored with her before that time.
“I mean, if you want that too,” he said to her.
Mac didn’t want that. Perhaps sleeping together had been on the cards since day one because she was both weak and foolish when it came to her leading men, but she couldn’t do a fling with him. If she agreed she would be looking around the corner all the time waiting for the moment he decided he’d had enough; that he was walking away – that he was bored with her. It would tear her apart.
A once-off was something she would very rarely consider. Even a moment ago it had seemed like the worst idea, but that was before he’d suggested a fling. She already knew she was going to sleep with him. That seemed inevitable right now. However, if she had a choice between a once-off and a fling, she had to choose the option less likely to break her heart, didn’t she?
“No,” she said to him. “We do this once, and once only.”
Having sex with him once wouldn’t shatter her the way a casual relationship would when he ended it. Well, that was what she was choosing to believe right now. It was her only hope of walking away from this thing between them without her heart being obliterated.
“Once?” he questioned her.
“Once,” she confirmed. “You can’t fight this anymore and neither can I. But I don’t want to go down the same path that I went down with Danny. So…I think we should just do it. Then maybe we can move past this.”
“Move past this?” he repeated.
“Go back to being friends and co-workers. Maybe it will be easier to do that after we…you know.”
She was crazy. Ryan was quite sure of it. There was no way that having sex once was going to be good for them. What would a once-off do to their friendship and their working relationship? But he could see the determination in her eyes; her resolve not to go down the same path as she had gone down with Danny. How could he fault her for her logic? He couldn’t.
He had to be honest though.
“I don’t think once is going to be enough,” he said to her. Not to mention that the level of awkwardness between them would go through the roof if they did this.
“It has to be enough,” she told him.
There was a hint of desperation in her voice that he didn’t like – as if sleeping together right now was some kind of Hail Mary pass to something he didn’t completely understand. His gaze slid to the clock on her kitchen wall. Seventeen past ten. Maybe she needed more time to think this through. Hell, they could both benefit from a moment here.
“We should do this later.”
“No. Now,” she said to him.
It had to be now, Mac thought, while she still felt like she had some semblance of control over this situation; while she still felt as if she was the one calling the shots.
“We only have thirteen minutes,” he told her.
“Then we’ll have to be quick,” she told him. “I thought you said you couldn’t stop.”
Ryan was well aware he’d said that, but doing this right here and right now was going to shoot everything to hell.
“Mac…”
Mac had had quite enough of talking about this thing between them. Now that she’d decided to act on it, she was just going to jump straight into the fire. What was the point in waiting any longer? She was done pretending she didn’t want him in her bed. She threw herself at him, kissing him with everything she had.
He was slow to respond, and for a moment she worried he might push her away, but in the end he returned her kiss in a heart-slamming, bone-liquefying, earth-moving way that left her completely breathless. Yes. This was what she’d wanted. His power, his strength, his sheer masculinity had tantalized her from the very beginning, and right now it was hers to explore and appreciate. Finally.
She let her hands slide down his body before slipping them under his t-shirt so that she could finally touch the muscles she’d admired so many times before. They tightened and tensed underneath her fingertips and he moaned into her mouth.
“Take it off,” she demanded between kisses, her hands going to the hem of his T-shirt.
Ryan knew this was wrong. So wrong. She would regret this. They both would. But hearing the raw need in her voice had the remaining vestiges of his restraint snapping. He whipped the shirt over his head, nearly losing his mind when her hands found his chest like heat seeking missiles, roaming over his body as if she couldn’t get enough of him.
The wild abandon with which she was attacking him released something hot and primal and fierce inside him. He could have her. Finally, he could have her. He didn’t have to hold back a moment longer. He cupped her breasts, feeling the outline of her hardened peaks beneath his thumbs. She pushed her breasts into the palms of his hands and he felt even more of his blood rush south.
He found the zip at the back of her dress, dragging it down as far as he could. She shrugged the straps off her shoulder so that her dress fell to her waist. Desire hammered him as he took in the lacy, light blue bra with dark blue bow that she was wearing. He knew with utmost certainty that her underwear would match. His heart was racing so fast, and his blood felt thick and hot as he undid the catch on her bra. She let it slip off her arms.
“Ryan,” she cried as he took one of her ripe peaks into his mouth.
He circled it with his tongue and tugged on it gently. She moved her hips against his throbbing erection, just about killing him with the sensations that it caused. His hands skimmed down her sides and disappeared under her dress. He groaned when she spread her legs for him; a shameless suggestion that he should touch her. He’d never seen her like this before – so uninhibited and free. She wanted him and she wasn’t afraid to show it. He’d never been more turned on his life.
He ran a finger over her through her underwear, his body literally jerking with the need to be inside her when he realized just how ready she was for him. He ran his finger over her again, and she moaned again more loudly and spread her legs even further apart.
“Yes,” she said to him as he slid her underwear over her hips and they dropped to the floor.
Mac closed her eyes, colours exploding behind her eyelids as Ryan touched her where she wanted him to. Her hands gripped the bench behind her, doing her best to hold herself up as he slipped his thumb back and forth over the bundle of nerve endings between her legs; all the while his mouth and tongue continued to lavish attention on her breasts. She felt the tension mounting inside her; felt it winding tighter and tighter and tighter, until she could climb no higher. Her body burned and tingled everywhere for a second and then boom – fireworks!
Ryan looked up as he heard Mac shout out in pleasure. Her eyes were closed. Her head was thrown back. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly, and her whole body was shaking. With her breasts exposed and her dress still around her hips, she was a vision. He’d never seen anything more beautiful. He’d never wanted anyone so much. He was so achingly hard he couldn’t wait another minute to be with her.
“You’re so beautiful, Mac.”
Mac opened her eyes. The aftershocks of her climax were still rocking through her, but the mere sound of his voice – husky and thick – made her body feel as if it was starting to spark all over again. And when she took in the hungry look on his face; the midnight-black colour of his eyes, she felt the coil of desire pull tighter. He hauled her against him and kissed her hungrily.
“Condoms,” she said against his mouth, her hands going to the fastening of his shorts. “In the bedroom.”
Ryan never stopped kissing her as he took his wallet out of his pocket, and retrieved what she assumed was a condom. He slapped it on the bench behind her.
“Here?” she whispered.
“And now,” he told her.
Mac’s anticipation of what was coming soared. She quickly unfastened his shorts and pushed them off his hips before she freed him from the boxers he was wearing – an extraordinary feat considering how unsteady her hands were. His erection stood out proudly. There was no denying he was impressive. She stroked her hand along the length of him, gliding her thumb over the tip of him.
His hips jerked forward as he moaned her name. She reached behind her with her spare hand and grabbed the condom Ryan had placed there a moment ago. She tore her mouth away from his so she could concentrate on what she was doing. She ripped the foil packet quickly and then rolled the condom down his length, his hand on top of hers, guiding her the whole way.
“I can’t wait any longer, Mac,” he told her as his hands slid under her dress again and he lifted her up by her hips. He positioned himself to take her.
“Please,” was all she said to him as she grabbed his shoulders.
It was all Ryan needed to hear. His heart was like a jack-hammer as he thrust forward, joining them together. He heard her cry out at the intrusion. He felt her fingernails dig into the skin of his shoulders, but he barely registered either incident. All he could focus on was how good it felt to be surrounded by her tight wet heat. He’d never felt more complete, more whole, more alive, than he did in that moment.
Her eyes, which had closed as he filled her, now opened and latched onto his, creating a connection that felt far too intense. God, they shouldn’t be doing this. They were friends. They cared about each other. They worked together. This wasn’t some random hook-up or some girl who wanted a shot at him because of who he was. This was Mac.
“Ryan,” she whispered softly, clutching at his shoulders.
But it was too late to stop it now, and he didn’t want to stop this – couldn’t stop this. He’d never felt this good before.
She did her best to rock her hips, obviously ready for him to start moving. He leaned in and kissed her; sweeping his tongue along hers as he started to move, which only served to intensify everything he was already feeling. Every stroke of his body into hers, every small whimper and moan she made into his mouth, every pleasurable sensation that stole through him told him that this was something bigger than he’d ever experienced before.
And when he felt her body find its release around him, and his name tumbled from her lips, he felt his whole world shake as he went over the edge with her.
____________________________________________________
Should you have any concerns about the rating please let me know. To everyone who is commenting, voting and fanning, I appreciate the support tremendously! <3